How I Learned to Embrace Fear
By: Mike Collette (Owner of Prototype Training Systems)
A recent post I shared with you titled Scavenger, Fitness and Perfect Days talked a little about how a goal of ours is to create memories and stories for you at Prototype.
Stories are important. Actually, they are everything. We listen to stories and we engage with really, really good ones, to a point where we get sucked in.
Some of the stories you create can be done through fitness and can be LIFE changing. Have you ever read about someone’s 100lb weight loss journey? Pretty awesome story, right?
The reason I am telling you this is that one of the enduring goals of Prototype is to help facilitate these memorable stories so you can do the things in life that matter with your fitness. We love to hear about you training for a 5k, a marathon, a Spartan Race, an adventure race or to be able to run around with your grandkids. We can help you prepare for any of it. That doesn’t mean those things won’t be scary. I remember hearing this quote that “if something isn’t scary, it’s not worth doing.”
I wanted to share the approach I’ve taken to slowly ease into the scary stuff, embrace daily stress, and do the hard stuff:
1.) First, understand that fear and excitement feels the same to your body and your brain.
Yes, they literally feel the same. When you start getting anxious before doing something, ask yourself: “Am I actually scared, or am I just excited?”
As adults, we’re not excited often. We aren’t like we were when we were little kids. Our body’s default response to increased blood pressure, elevated heart rate and surging adrenalin is fear. Then we fall into a downward spiral and get scared when we should really be excited.
Here’s something you can practically use: You’re about to do a 1RM Clean and Jerk. You get to the barbell and you’re staring at it. You’ve trained, you’re strong, you’ve been practicing your technique, now it’s GO TIME! That feeling then starts to take over. Instead of thinking “oh no, can I do this?” I want you to visualize that you get to open your presents on Christmas. That’s not scary, is it? It’s exciting!
2.) Second, know that the anticipation is worse than the event.
Our fear of what might happen is always way out of the scope from what actually happens. Our lizard brain takes over and our mind takes us to the worst-case scenario. We then overthink, create anxiety, and elevate our heart rate for days prior to the event. When the event actually starts, we’re exhausted from replaying the possibilities over and over! We’ve already done the whole event—with every catastrophe included!—1000 times!
Waiting, deliberating, anticipating—they’re always worse than doing. If you can choose when to start the hard thing, choose to start it right now. Skip the hard part. That’s why your coaches control the clock in class and you don’t!
3.) Third, put the event in perspective: Will you actually remember this in a year?
If not, it’s not worth stressing about. If you WILL remember the event a year from now, it’s REALLY worth doing. Basically, will you regret not doing it?
4.) Fourth, remember that we all get scared and have fears.
You’re not alone. Regardless if you’re a professional athlete, a CEO at the top of your game, or someone who is afraid of their own shadow, we all have fears.
This isn’t just something that YOU only struggle with. If you understand that, our fears become easier to deal with and there is less judgement you need to hold over your head.
5.) Lastly, just do the hard stuff. It will benefit you more and add to your story.
In Chris Cooper’s final speech at the 2020 Two Brain Summit, he told us a story about how he made the hard decision to bike in downpouring rain on a frigid Saturday morning. He rode that day because that’s when he rides. He talked more about the ride and what he endured but the message was clear, he chose the hard path that day. While he could have not gone out in the frigid rain and rode his bike, he made the decision to do the hard stuff.
This led him to reference a scene from one of my favorite movies, Good Will Hunting. Remember the scene when Robin Williams (Sean) is talking with Matt Damon’s character (Will) in his office about Will’s abuse as a kid? This is the famous “it’s not your fault” scene.
Sean shares his experience with his father and Will responds:
Will: “He used to just put a belt, a stick, and a wrench on the kitchen table and say, ‘Choose.’”
Sean: “Well, I gotta go with the belt there.”
Will: “I used to go with the wrench.”
Sean: “Why?”
Will: “’Cause f*ck him. That’s why.”
Life is a series of moments. We create standout moments when we do the things that scare us. When we do the things that make us uncomfortable. And when we do the hard stuff. This builds on your story. Any story without these moments is boring. In the end, these are the things that matter most.
Inspiration provided by Chris Cooper at Catalystgym.com.